i have taken to adding alcohol to every drink i make for myself

making herbal tea?

• add some wine 

making coffee?

• need some whiskey up in that shit brah

getting yourself a glass of water?

• JUST GET A GLASS OF VODKA INSTEAD

is that hot chocolate?

• PASS
• THE
• TEQUILA
• BRAH

wine and cheese on a friday night in?

• pour some sambuca in that merlot
• to give a little punch
• y’know
• like the kinda punch that you feel in your stomach
• before you
• chunder
• every
• where